I'm having a strange set of thoughts when I look around my contacts list and start deleting so many people. You look at the names and think who are these people and where did I meet them. Why did I have the name and number, when did I meet, where did I meet them, and it hits me. The time I sat and listened to them and there story, the heart wrenching story of how their life was in shambles and they needed someone just to listen. I gave my time freely, I listened and gave my heart felt opinion of how it was going to be alright, life was going to work out. I made sure, and checked up on them and gave them more time and energy to ensure to stay the course. Why would I do this, because I saw choices I had made before, and knew I could help. I could offer words of comfort and advice to ensure the crisis was not the end, but just a bump in the road. Where did you all go? Time to collect, actually its a collection of time. Now I ask the question or should I even ask this of you, you a stranger now. You now owe me the time I gave you, no and you don't even know who are or where I am ?
Funny though, you don't know that do you, because you haven't kept in touch. I reached out a few times, I tried to see how you were doing, give you a nudge. I let you know I was still thinking of you and hey remember the time we spent, laugh, you cried on my shoulders, I listened. I listened to you for hours, intently, gave you my best, unbiased opinions on your thoughts. Thoughts of life crisis at that time in your life. Crisis, that was not a life crisis, and we laugh about it. I relayed to you after listening for hours how insignificant, small and even overwhelming your thoughts were. But, did you even notice how I did it. Hours of effective listening, you just needed someone to care and look you into your eyes. Give you a hug and say its ok.
I delete a few more names, and the stories flow, their times of crisis in the middle of night. The drunken rages, bad choices, life choices, decisions that would alter your life. Why would you give me those secrets, because you knew that I gave you that security.. How did I give it to you, what did I say that time to help you understand and give and understanding. What did I share from my life's pain and relive to help you. In this lifetime, made you think I would not tell the next person. Even possibly tell your world what you thought of them, or what you were doing to them behind their back. Because with time, is trust. But, I am a lock box of secrets and its time to collect back the time I gave out. Come pick up your key and open the box, collect your pain and let me some time that I gave you, I need it back now. My energy is low, my spirit that you saw in me, I gave you without question. I respectfully request your presence, however I keep deleting the names and thinking I did it because that's who I am. How do you collect time, I collected old watches and put them in a box. Trying to fix and rework the springs, the hands broken. I slowly and carefully touch the tiny wheels and get it to spin, it works. Time is now beginning again, once broken, now moving, just for today. On to the next broken watch, just like the next broken person that found me. Delete another name, memory of a life crisis, small to me, large in life to them. Because I lived it, not in their shoes, but I feel the pain, I listen, I comfort, I offer words, many words, they move on. I watch or hear of their life from a distance, facebook, twitter, instragram or word from another friend of a friend. I could use their shoulder, their comfort, just a word of comfort, their time. Delete another name.
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